The Year of Joy
"So also you have sorrow now, but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you." // John 16:22
**I recommend watching this in HD through Vimeo, but watching it through this link works just fine as well!**
The Year of Joy. That's what this last year was about. It was about finding joy in the simple things such as walking past my favorite tree everyday as it started to bloom on the sidewalk, deepening friendships, hiking through tall forests and snowy mountains, eating a doughnut for the 3rd time in one day, seeing parts of the world I have yet to explore, holding hands with wee ones and listening to them giggle. The little things, ya know? But joy comes in mourning, too. It comes in those hard times and the sad times. Well, at least it was my goal to find it in those hard times. Like when my granny passed away way too early, or when I did poorly in a class, or when I disappointed a client, got in a car accident, argued with my best friend, dealt with depression, the list goes on. For me, finding joy in those moments looked a lot like forgiveness, repentance, true understanding, and giving up a lot to God. And sometimes, it just doesnt feel joyful and it simply blows- and I think that is just fine, too. But, the pursuit of joy is what matters, not just the end result of joy itself. When my granny passed away I turned my mourning into joy by following through with my trip to Cambodia and Thailand, which was one of her favorite places. I flew around Denali and was filled with such pure delight I felt like I was on (or above) cloud nine. When I danced with the Ombogo girls in Kenya, I felt as if my heart could explode.
The verse above is one that I have been sitting on for the past year and praying about ever so often. Jesus is talking to his disciples before he is crucified and reassuring them that they will see him again, and that in the midst of it all, that even though they may have sorrow, that they will have joy again (when he returns) and that no one can take that away from them. No one can take away your joy. Say it again for the people in the back? NO ONE CAN TAKE AWAY YOUR JOY! I hope you believe that, too.
When I continue to think back on this past year, I am truly grateful for all of the exploring, loving, and learning I have been able to do. Above all, I look back I am overwhelmed by how lucky I am to have done all of this. I was able to travel to Thailand, Cambodia, Kenya, and Rwanda. I took numerous road trips and visited friends in their respective cities that they now call home. I took time off work so I could focus on school and create work I was proud of. I started to build up plans for my tiny home and watch my post grad dreams begin to flourish. The privilege that is inherent in my life is astronomical. I am getting a wonderful education, eating delicious and healthy food, staying warm in a home that is way too big for me, I have clean clothes on my back and the luxury of driving a vehicle (although it may be a little rough at times) AND I can travel. A lot. Way more than most people. I have learned a lot about myself this past year as well as learning much about others. In reality, nothing much has changed for me geographically, but rather mentally and spiritually.
A year ago, I wrote a blog post that asked these questions. I answered them below!
What will Kenya be like? (Side note: Kenya was autocorrected to Kanye, so theres that)
Answer: Kenya was amazing, challenging, and life giving- all in one big pile. I look forward to writing about it soon!
Will I fall in love? With a person instead of ice cream?
Answer: Well, the easy answer would be that Ice cream is still my numba one.
Let's hope I graduate?
Answer: Nope!!! Graduation was pushed back until March of 2017. Super senior what upppp??!
Who will be standing by my side through it all?
Answer: My incredible roommate (and bestie) Alley and my amazing best gals Hailey, Mimi, Jacquie, Annie, and Charlotte. and the best guys: Cannon and Gunnar. My friend Hannah was an encouragement to me throughout my time in Kenya + Rwanda and I am so thankful for her! My parents have been instrumental this past year. They have given so much support and so much love! I am so very grateful for my growing relationship with them .
Where will my feet explore?
Answer: Well, shoot. A lot of places. More than I anticipated. I took so many trips and explored various hikes and I am thrilled about it.
Was I loving enough?
Answer: Probably not. However, I tried real hard. Thats what counts, right?
Will I still struggle with annoying medical issues?
Answer: If we are being honest I would say that while my physical health has seemingly improved due to medication and changing my diet to stabilize my blood sugar and balance so many other things that I am sure you don't want to read about, but my mental health has taken a toll on me. Anxiety, stress, and my ADHD have been felt in ways that I had yet to experience. But we are working on it.
Where will I work? Will I still be able to take almost daily naps?
Answer: Still working at Shelby Payne Photography, BUT, now volunteering weekly with an incredible organization called Skookum Kids!! Naps, still daily. Still loving it.
Those questions do not reveal much, but yet they existed in my head last year so they mattered then and I suppose they matter now. While the answers to them have been answered, I hope I continue to ask those same questions every year and push myself to grow!
When I originally wrote that blog post last year and chose to start this blog thingy, I desired to challenge myself and to push myself creatively and document MY life a little bit, instead of focusing my attention on documenting others'. What you find above is a little montage of that. A short little blip of the adventures I had and people who found their way into my life. I hope you enjoy it!!
Music: Petit Biscuit, Once Again
